Tricky Trends

In the great world of cars, trends good and bad are followed relentlessly. Manufacturers get so caught up in “the moment” of what’s perceived as trendsetting that they often design features or sometimes entire cars that actually go against the very essence of what their brand stands for.

Somehow, the Toyota Yaris doesn’t come standard with an air conditioner or alloy wheels and yet it is fitted with an extravagant centrally mounted digital (on the hatchback, analogue on the sedan) instrument display. The Renault Scenic is another example of this instrument display.
Do these manufacturers not know that if something is not directly in your line of view, your significantly inferior peripheral vision takes over? Hardly conducive towards safe family motoring, something both Renault and Toyota strive to provide.

Then we have the first generation Polo Classic (at least, the first generation launched in South Africa).
While it was seriously unpretty / boring and therefore couldn’t have had ambitions of setting any trend, it nevertheless was fitted with a design feature that (and I stand to be corrected here) I had never before seen on a car and which spread rapidly to other vehicles – namely, a single rear reverse light.
There can be no logical explanation for this besides cost-cutting. What it does is to provide the rear of your car with an unbalanced appearance and permanently make it appear as though one reverse light is broken. It is also less safe – if anything happens to be obscuring the side of the vehicle without that reverse light, those viewing it from behind won’t always know it’s moving backwards.
Seems a petty concern, but it’s simply unnecessary.

It is my next “trend” that really gets me hot under the collar (and depending on which car I happen to drive, her too!).
Apparently, modern vehicles have become so impeccably well engineered that some of them no longer require the once obligatory temperature gauge. All that is now needed is a single and often miniscule red lamp in the instrument panel that illuminates once your engine is probably on the verge of exploding while you’re traversing De Waal Drive at 20km/h on a Friday afternoon.
The very point of a gauge is to be able to constantly be aware of how warm the engine is. This way, you’ll be alerted instantly when it starts to heat up and long before steam starts spewing from underneath the bonnet of your Chevrolet Spark (which, you guessed it, is one of the offenders).
As advanced as they have become, modern vehicles’ engines still run on petrol, they still rely upon a cooling system and they can still overheat.

Car names are another moot point. It seems as though designing a car from scratch takes so much effort that there is insufficient brainpower left for the team to think up a reasonable model name.
Volkswagen has loads of fun revising its dated CitiGolf every 5 days or so, complete with new individual designations for each model in the line-up that range from an eerie canine to a synonym for doggedness; I doubt anyone will feel very good telling their mother-in-law that they drive a Citi Wolf or a TenaCiti. A sharply raised eyebrow is sure to follow.
Manufacturers of 4X4s are perhaps even worse. They can’t resist the tendency to drown their gas-guzzling beasts in an hilarious assortment of masculine words like Defender, Discovery, Commander or Outback. Or, if you often indulge in the odd trip around your backyard, you could get yourself a VW Touran Track and Field. Not many could have predicted that cars would one day be named according to the surface they’re adept at driving on.
Let’s all hold thumbs for a BMW X5 Road and Driveway.

But perhaps more bizarre than all of these is a car that tries extremely hard to be trendy when it is actually quite terrible.
The range-topping Tata Indigo GLX comes standard with awful interior plastics, a breathless engine, refinement notable only by its absence and… a dual rear DVD entertainment system. Hell, they’ve even thrown in leather upholstery. Whether it’s real leather or not is highly
debatable.


Tata Indigo

What it all boils down to is that far too often, being perceived as cool, funky or trendy takes preference over reliability, practicality and good old common sense.
Then again, who would say no to the ridiculously overindulgent fingerprint recognition system on the Audi A8 that adjusts seats and the like to your preferences at the touch of a little electronic pad…? Not me.